i'm sitting here
alone
i'm pitching a tent like a camper's home
all i've got tonight, are dirty feet and giggles
and Rover, and this jar of Jif
and i grab a butter knife
to end my virginal strife
i've tried hard hard HARD
to get between you and him
but in the end of you, i begin
i take a deep breath that is dreamy
and smear on some extra creamy
and i call the canine over
to try out my new lollipop boner
when senor skippy is in town
all i think about
is my dog going down
and this is why i used vaginal cream
that time when i tried out for swim team
i had to shave my legs and my balls
but no knowledge of the bathroom, i did it in the hall
i shit myself at the family reunion
and that time i first received my holy communion
the moon is rising
and these extra two inches tonight are surprising
and i
and you
and ro-o-over too
can't believe
what your new crush just did to my shoe
[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/dirty-feet-giggles-lyrics-laika.html ]
there is feces all inside
and it's covering the fresh leather hide
do you remember what tonight is
the night Elvis dies while taking a piss
and it was on the television
and my sperm is now spraying like nuclear fission
and now i need Kleenex Cottonelle
cuase this sticky feeling is comparable with hell
and i'm sick of low fat lays
and they more i hate it, the more my gizz sprays
and now windex is required
for now my ejaculate has retired
to window overlooking the tree house
and i must clean it up as quiet as a mouse
but alas i make an utterance
it is my mom, a goddamn stutterance
she has caught me, red handed
tissue on dick
with that creamy Jif
all over my stick
and it's not even a maternal figure
it's you and you're dressed like a wigger
I hate fat Albert Jeans
can someone HOLLA for me if they know what I mean
Alas, i recover my .38
it is the only way to go out after you masturbate.
BA BLAM
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