Technical Foul Lyrics

by Adam Sandler

Look you've got to understand
Its just been me and Eleanor for sixty-seven years
So she gets nervous around strangers
I wouldnt show that picture to any one

Or they might try to take you two guys back to the laboratory
Listen we got rules in this house, and you better follow
Them or youll find yourself outta of here
This might be harder then I thought

If youre coming from street, with dirty shoes on your feet
Thats a technical foul
If you switch the radio to some modern music show
Thats a technical foul
If you dont shut the door after using the fridgerator
Thats a technical foul, a technical foul

If you touch the thermostat, youll get hit with a bat
'Cause thats a technical foul, youll feel my wrath
If your hair clogs the drain, youll know the meaning of pain

Cause thats a technical foul, Ill show you no mercy
This is such bull shit, hey in this house we say bull spit
Or its a technical foul, a technical foul

Let me get this straight
You expect me to change my entire lifestyle in one night
Because you guys are a couple of psychotic control freaks
You got it bub or you can go rot in the gutter
It's up to you Yankee Doodle

Well, I dont want to do that
But let me run a few questions by you
So I dont screw up accidentally

If I dont spray Lysol, after moving a bowel
Thats a technical foul, okay?
If I decide to wash my ass with your monogrammed towel
Thats a technical foul

Please say, hieney
If I make fun of your crazy feeties
Or give sugar cookies to Miss Diabetes
Thats not only technical foul but, possibly a homicide

Can I sleep past three?
If you do youll get a T
Take a wizz in those flowers
I'll say hit the showers
Use this horn as a bong
Adios Tommy Chong

Make some long distance calls
Youll get a kick in the balls
Can I walk around with my morning erection?
If you want an automatic ejection
'Cause thats a technical foul

But I'd like to see it anyway, just kiddin'

There are certain rules which apply in one's life
With your sister, friends or imaginary wife
I cant believe, I havent killed myself
Respect carries over me on the court
Here with Wigs Magee, and a fury elf

Whether you're Jewish diabetic or especially short
Shes ironic and hes a troll
I see, shes strange in my royal carry
My imaginary wife is short and hairy
They took my wig, I remember the look in their eyes

How did my life get stuck in this shit hole?
Why oh why won't someone retrieve my wig, wig, wig?
Guess I have to deal with your demands
But please dont touch me with your alien hands

I got no right to growl
The whistle she's on the prowl
Without my wig, I look like an owl
Oh, my God, dont laugh at her

Or it's a technical foul
Or it's a technical foul
Or it's a technical foul