This Hotel Room Lyrics

This hotel room got a lot of stuff A laundry bag and a shoe shine cloth Thirty-two hangers and a touch-tone phone Well, a light that comes on when I'm not home I ain't home, I ain't home You better leave a message 'cause I ain't home
They got an air conditioner for when I'm hot A radiator for when I'm not Two big chairs sitting side by side With a Holy Bible and a TV guide TV guide, TV guide, great God o' mighty It's a TV guide
I got a second story view from curb to curb I got a sign that reads 'Do not disturb' A monogram towel and a bucket of ice A chest of drawers and a mirror that lies Mirror that lies, mirror that lies That couldn't be me in the gorilla disguise
They got a room service menu for food and drinks A porcelain thrown and an aluminum sink Two big pillows to rest my head A magic fingers and a king size bed
Put in a quarter, turn out the light Magic fingers makes you feel alright Feel alright, feel alright Magic fingers makes you feel alright
Oh this ol' hotel's alright with me They pay the postage if you lose the key This hotel has got a lot of stuff But I do believe I have had enough
Call my baby, said, “Don't you pout I'm packing my bags and I'm checking out Just as soon as you hang up the telephone Stick a candle in the window I'm coming home Coming home, coming home Stick a candle in the window, I'm coming home”