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Troll Doll Celebrities Lyrics

from The Bathroom Wall

"Troll Doll Celebrities" is track #7 on the album The Bathroom Wall. It was written by Fallon Jimmy.
"Troll Doll Celebrities" is track #7 on the album The Bathroom Wall. It was written by Fallon Jimmy.

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Hello, hello my name is Jimmy Fallon
And welcome to the auditions for Troll Productions Inc
Remember, we're looking for a star or celebrity

To sponsor our new line of trolls dolls, in our new series of commercials
So thanks for coming
Let's just start the auditions, first up, Mr. John Travolta

She's like, I swear to God, I mean
I can't believe you guys are trying to sell these things, right
I mean like, who does his hair? I mean like, his hair's so frizzy
I mean like, you guys can probably get some

Like, anti-freeze shampoo or something, right? I mean
I don't know how you guys expect to sell these things
Looking so weird, right?

Thank you, next up, Cliff Calvin, the mailman from Cheers?

Hey, thanks a lot to ya buddy
I was talking with Marty about these dolls
Turns out, the uh, turns out the actual midget trolls
Were made in the 1300's, by, Indian chiefs

Looking for a story to keep their children occupied
These trolls are nice but I'd rather be having a beer
With Normy back at the bar

Thank you, Cliffy, next up, comedian Jerry Seinfeld

Okay people, okay will you look at these things?
I mean, do you remember when dolls used to have
Moving arms and legs, am I right? He doesn't have any pants on
What's the deal with that? No pants, you get the doll
You don't get the pants

Thank you, uh, next up, actor Nicolas Cage
Who? What? Where?

That's all I got for that one actually
Next up, comedian Robin Williams

Oh yes, troll dolls, yes a beautiful thing, yes
It's a beautiful thing, yes looks like Don King on Viagra, yes
Yes, suddenly the guy's at home going
"What the hell's going on there?", yes

Meanwhile, there's a kid at home going
"Daddy, I want the Harry Potter doll", yes
Meanwhile, the guy's at home going
"I'm seeing the anti-Christ and it is a troll doll", yes

Suddenly Arnold Schwarzenegger's at home going
"Yeah, I like to eat troll doll with my English Muffin", yes
Suddenly, Mr. Happy's coming out going
"Lewinski, Lewinski", yes thank you

Next up, next up, next up for the auditions, Mr. Gilbert Gottfried

What is this? What kinda kid plays with something like this?
They're so weird looking
What kinda kid would play with something like this?
I'd like to be the voice of this and that's not good

Thank you, last but not least, Mr. Adam Sandler

Alright, how ya doing? Alright, this is, okay, this is, this is me
Giving a troll doll to, to my mother, okay
Here we go, "Mom, I, hi I, I, I got you a troll
What did you say?
I said, I, I said, I got you a troll"

I can't hear you, What did you say to your poor mother?
Speak up, please
I said, "I got you a troll
I'm outta control, what are you saying?
I wish you would just take the doll and shut up"

That's enough for the trolls
Thank you very much

Fallon Jimmy

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